Anxiety is a silent destroyer that robs many of us of our peace, joy and eventually health and Love.
The good news: We can stop it in its tracks!
I’ll share the story of a friend (I’ll call Bob) to illustrate the damage and the resolution. Although Bob was a very friendly and sensitive man, extremely smart and skilled in his field, whenever he was questioned or challenged on a point, he froze. He feared that others would see him (just as he saw himself) as less than they were.
His fear of freezing up prevented him from defending his position. In addition, he feared becoming disregarded and being considered a joke by his colleagues. He was on the horns of a dilemma, which he resolved by himself becoming very confrontational. People tiptoed around him, not daring to disagree with him lest he yell, criticize them and make them feel like fools.
Initially Bob believed he had found his niche and it was working quite well for him. Except he didn’t understand why his colleagues didn’t like him or want to spend time with him. He heard the office stories of their getting together, having a good time at lunch or after work on occasional outings. But, if Bob was there, it was quite and subdued.
He came to me and asked if I knew why everyone hated him. In the process of reviewing his situation, Bob revealed his self-image fears, how unhappy he was, his self-disgust and that he had little to none self-confidence. He felt beside himself in doubt and disbelief. He doubted he could ever be good enough to fit in and all the while disbelieving he was the insensitive jerk everyone else saw him to be.
And as if this travesty wasn’t enough, his doctor had just told him his stress had his blood pressure skyrocketing and if he didn’t resolve this drama, he would likely have a heart attack. To Bob, who saw himself as a nice guy, life had dealt him a bad hand. It wasn’t fair. He was experiencing road rage while driving and meltdowns at home with his bewildered family.
In fact, this was the worst part of it all – his family, his beloved wife and children, had distanced themselves from him. The last straw had been the holidays. To make things right, he had sprung to take everyone, wife, kids and grandkids, his entire family, to Disney World. And there it happened. In the midst of everyone having a great time, one cross word had set him off. His wife later told him he had raged on and on for 30 minutes. The entire trip was a disaster. He was beside himself with his own disgust.
Now, let’s jump ahead and get to the good point of this story. Having reviewed all this that Bob and others like him go through, there’s an answer. This is how Bob resolved the problem and it works for anyone and everyone. There’s An Answer from I Can Be Me
- Take ownership of the situation. Accept we are where we are based upon the choices we have made and the actions we’ve taken.
- Accept that in owning the situation, we have the right and the power to change it to what we want it to be. We can choose and act to implement our choices.
- Write to acknowledge and face our fears. In writing, we bring our fears out of the dark closet where we’ve hidden them, shine our light of acceptance and watch them lose their power over us. After all – their only power is the power we’ve given them!
- Accept that each of us, have and are doing the best we can where we are, what we’ve known or thought and with the environment we’ve been in. When we made a mistake, it was generally what we thought was the best choice at the time.
- Visualize how you would want God, The Loving Creative Force of the Universe, to show mercy and grace to the one person you love most in the world (whoever it may be) and forgive them for something they didn’t realize was so important.
- Accept that forgiveness for yourself. Now, give it to someone else. Next, expand and give it to more, accepting that the more you share it – the more you have of it.
Like tossing a pebble into the pond, we start with one and watch the ripples fan out.
This is the foundation for what I call the EMBRACE Life Principle – Unconditionally acknowledging, accepting (non-judgmentally), and being vulnerable and compassionate, sharing, encouraging
and loving ourselves, everyone and everything.
May I ask you 3 questions?
- What do you think life, your life, would be like if everyone unconditionally acknowledged, accepted (non-judgmentally), was vulnerable and compassionate, sharing, encouraging and loving ourselves, everyone and everything?
- Is this a change you’d like to see?
- Do you see how assimilating and expressing the EMBRACE Life Principle would assist you in being the change you’d like to see?
Show Me the Way from Say & Sing Along to Prosperity (Disc 1)